I don’t want to brag or make anyone jealous or anything, but I can still fit into the earrings I wore in high school.
Here are 15 reasons why it’s good to be a woman:
- We got off the Titanic first.
- We can scare male bosses with mysterious gynecological disorder excuses.
- Taxis stop for us.
- We don’t look like a frog in a blender when dancing.
- No fashion faux pas we make could ever rival the Speedo.
- We don’t have to pass gas to amuse ourselves.
- If we forget to shave, no one has to know.
- We can congratulate our teammate without ever touching her rear end.
- We never have to reach down every so often to make sure our privates are still there.
- We have the ability to dress ourselves.
- We can talk to the opposite sex without having to picture them naked.
- If we marry someone 20 years younger, we are aware that we will look like an idiot.
- We will never regret piercing our ears.
- There are times when chocolate really can solve all your problems.
- We can make comments about how silly men are in their presence because they aren’t listening anyway.
- We can get laid anytime we want
- We rarely have to buy our own drinks at the bar
- We get to shop at Victoria’s Secret
- We get out of speeding tickets by crying
- Men are like tiles, lay em right the first time ya can walk all over em forever
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